When I sleep and when I wake up couldn’t have been more indifferent to each other. No matter when sleep decides to grace my prickling conscience, my alarm will go off at 5 sharp and somehow, my body doesn’t revolt then. It suddenly, gets a jolt of never before found motivation and is on a power drive. Brush, tablet, brush hair, check hair, re do hair, chuck hair, grab keys, purse and shoes and off I go, to walk in the chilly monsoon mornings, headfirst, brain freeze.
Did you see that? You saw what it did?
It didn’t care and laughed that sly, raspy laugh of an aristocrat to another.
Does sleep care? Hardly. It’s too cold to be sleeping with the windows open and not cold enough to be thankful for Windows and doors, the time is neither so late that the leftover bits of guilt put me to forced sleep nor so early that I do not worry about it, the sounds are not quiet enough to put me in an involuntary state of mourning, nor are they loud enough to elicit an artless expression of disgust. The night isn’t going anywhere, it’s hanging but not quite dead.
Tiny little somethings start playing tiny little somethings with my eyes and I get the hint of , just the bare whiff of delicious sleep.Overjoyed, I close my eyes and lay, still, afraid to disturb the Royal, revered oncoming of the sleep, my stillness is my prayer. I close my eyes harder, awwwww yes, there it is, almost there, I can even foresee a generous spell of good dreams for the night…..
Something must have gone wrong. My Sleep refuses to cross the threshold of temptation and step into this bleak world of reality where, I have to wake up early in the morning tomorrow. Told you, doesn’t care.
It reminds me of all the poets I know. Obsessed with character, obsessed with the play, obsessed with how their own letters curve and crawl but never quite sure when asked ” Yeah, that’s fine. What next?”
My sleep was that poet. It was vain and stupid and completely blind to tomorrow morning, where I will face the world alone, with half functionality ,zero chill and 100 percent snap.
Are you happy now? Moron.